|
Post by Deonhower Colmyne on Mar 15, 2006 17:47:09 GMT -5
OMG if the funny bone and the G spot are connected... my next kinky toy would be my reflex hammer -+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by AREA666 on Mar 16, 2006 22:27:42 GMT -5
So we seem to have a problem now. While my penguins were having their arguement the toaster called in for reinforcements. So now an army of toasters is fighting my flying penguins. We can not have this kind of a internal problem if we ever expect to fulfil our plans. I think somewhere also the cheeze wiz and Spam cans are fighting as well. If we can get them to stop then they can become great allies and maybe then if we show the penguins and toasters the Spam and cheese wiz getting along they will stop their fighting. If all else fails then we can use the peanut butter.
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by Hallelujah on Mar 17, 2006 14:43:59 GMT -5
Crackers from the Soilent Green movie SHOULD do the trick. However, we would have to careful with the crumbs. It could be complete chaos if the Yeti, being full from all of people we fed them, showed up to try to interrogate the toaster about THEIR g-spot. -+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by AREA666 on Mar 17, 2006 15:47:55 GMT -5
Yes I do think they would keep the Yeti at bay, although it misght also give it a greater liking for human flesh. As for the toasters do not worry to much about them, my rat has plans to deal with them.
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by Hallelujah on Mar 17, 2006 18:16:53 GMT -5
All right, the plot thickens, or is that my oatmeal? I sincerely hope the rat arrives soon, we could definately use the blazing discs and bats to help round up the spam cans. They could be especially useful if the toaster calls in reinforcements. -+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by AREA666 on Mar 17, 2006 20:16:23 GMT -5
It is your oatmeal although it was actually a bowl of sawdust with water and you should really learn to not use glue in it in place of brown sugar. But I do have good news. I got a message from my rat today and he told me that he knows the arch enemy of the toaster. It is also so logical that I can not believe I did not think of it myself. It is forks. How many times have you seen people stick a fork in there and they get shocked? Not only does it hurt the human but it also shorts out the toaster, rendering it worthless. So now all we have to do is find an army of stupid people we can arm with forks to battle the toaster army when they make their move. I wish Alucard was here, he is the toaster expert and would probably know of other ways to counter them but since he is not this will have to do. His absense has me wondering that maybe the toasters have him captive since he knows to much. If that is the case then we have no time to waste.
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by Hallelujah on Mar 17, 2006 21:05:31 GMT -5
The army of stupid people is easy to provide... just lay down trails of Soilent Green cracker crumbs! Irresistable! If all else fails, just use the hovercraft to round them up, the gluey sawdust to clump them together and a few Yeti to herd them along!
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by AREA666 on Mar 17, 2006 21:20:40 GMT -5
I forgot the Yeti, I just told lindalou about how we have become surrounded by opposing armies, but the yeti are not against us or anybody else yet, We need to send an envoy to have them join our cause. Any volunteers? The only problem with the crackers is how will we resist them? They are oh so delecious and nutrious afterall. I think we will need you to begin construction on a large sawdust and glue ball. It can help us in our weapon me and lindalou were talking about. It can be the core of it, and then on top will be all our toejam, lint, mayo, ear wax, etc.
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
lindalou
Beta Wolf
[M0:0]What's another word for thesaurus?%\2\%
Posts: 372
|
Post by lindalou on Mar 21, 2006 3:03:21 GMT -5
If we have a core of glue and sawdust when it explodes they will be stuck where they stand and be easy prey for the flying penguins if we can get them to quit fighting with toasters. Perhaps if we present the penguins with a gift of luedafisk and say it is from the toasters.... But now that Alucard has said he is really with the enimy what will we do for Mayo? We must find a substitute!
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1152 × 864##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by AREA666 on Mar 21, 2006 18:08:42 GMT -5
Yes if he has indeed turned then we will need to find another substance. Miracle Whip seems to be a popular alternative, although I think Crisco might be more fun. Also if we do not get the penguins to stop their bickerings then I can call in my personal guard of obtuse flamingos. Since they can also fly they can take over in the penguins spot. The good thing about them is that since I am their lord they will obey me and the only person who can override me is wolfe and since she does not seem to be a part of our plans we should be safe.
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
lindalou
Beta Wolf
[M0:0]What's another word for thesaurus?%\2\%
Posts: 372
|
Post by lindalou on Mar 22, 2006 1:30:57 GMT -5
Most excellent, flying obtuse flamingos! Perfect, I will slip some hallucenginc toads in his coffee while he is distracted by the flamingos, it will be risky but I think I can get a cloaking spell from my voodo priestess. If not I will have to slip in thru his closet and give the toad a toss. I was champion toad tosser in highschool. I have a can of butter flavored Crisco in my cupboard and a moldy jar of fat free Miracle Whip in my fridge You may have either or both, which ever will do the most damage. Ahhh what terrible times we live in when ruffians can run around putting Win95 on old lady's computers. -+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1152 × 864##1-+-
|
|
TrollShaman
Omega Wolf
[M0:0]Good with his hands, carries lots of latex, fun at parties%\1\%
Posts: 35
|
Post by TrollShaman on Mar 22, 2006 2:42:14 GMT -5
I'll try not to be insulted that you would contact a voodoo priestess when you have a shaman here in your ranks. Yeah, I know, it's the troll thing, isn't it. Ever since that 'Three Billy Goats Gruff' crap us trolls have had a bad rep. Sure, there's a bad apple every now and again, but over all us trolls are a pretty solitude bunch that don't want trouble, just to be left alone. I'm one of the few you'll find wandering out among the humans, let alone actually socialize. But I digress.
I'd go with the Crisco. Either force feed it to him or fling the can at him, that stuff is more likely to do serious damage.
If all else fails, I say we reformat his hard drive and put MS-DOS 3.3 on his computer. I think I still have a floppy of it around here somewhere.
BTW, I'm going to make balloon rats, penguins, flamingos, and yeti so I can recreate this epic battle. If all fails, the world should know the heroic efforts of our heroic band of heroes. Now I just need a cameraman.
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
lindalou
Beta Wolf
[M0:0]What's another word for thesaurus?%\2\%
Posts: 372
|
Post by lindalou on Mar 22, 2006 4:29:34 GMT -5
I didn't know you could do spells also! Cool then I wont have to go all the way to Kalmazoo to see my Voodoo Priestess, besides Shaman is way easier to spell. Ok first things first can you make balloon armor for our computers? #wrapit# I fear the worst may have happened, Alucard has turned against us and has taken poor Area hostage. FIND THAT DISK with DOS on it. I agree whipping the whole can at him could do quite alot of damage, but if we smear the inside of his closet with the crisco when goes to hyper jump into one of our closets he will slip in the Crisco and slide into the black hole I have placed in the corner of his closet. Then all we will need are some re-heated jelly beans dipped in Cheeze Whiz and we can seal it shut and trap him in the black hole for all of eternity, well maybe not that long it would be awfully boring around here with out him. How about just long enough for him to come to his senses? Hmmmm I wonder how long that could take #thinking# Yeah I know, aint happening is it? Nope thats no fun either. What are we gonna do? #baffled# -+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1152 × 864##1-+-
|
|
|
Post by AREA666 on Mar 22, 2006 8:13:59 GMT -5
Excellent we will have a balloon memorial of our efforts. It is to bad I am not near you since I could film it or take pictures. Crisco it is though, the whole using it for its slippery properties makes it the clear winner. I also like the idea of uploading DOS to his brain. If we do this it will make him revert to a much more simple state of mind and we can easily reprogram him. We can even throw in the g-spot location for free for Wolfe. As for how long it will take him to come to his senses, well it will be like trying to get a caveman to integrate with a modern society of jelly, so I am not to sure. I am not sure if I am hostage though, I can do as I please, or I think I can, but I am also very confused since the many changings between myself and Alucard has left some residual brain waves of Alucard on me.
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|
Gamma Rat
Pup
[M0:0]Bow down before your savior
Posts: 9
|
Post by Gamma Rat on Mar 22, 2006 22:12:04 GMT -5
Yes, finally it is I, your friend and savior back from my trip to the Gamma quadrant. I have been in close contact with area and know all about your current predicament. Luckly for you all I can solve all your problems. In my trip I ran into a spatial rift that rewrote my dna. As you can tell from my picture I am now immense in size. Using me alone I can crush, eat, or poop on our enemies. Also you have no fear of Alucard. I have a heightened sense of smell and I will find the needed moldy mayo for you all and return it at once. As for his furby army they are not match for my laser eyes. Once you have the mayo you can complete your weapon and put and end to the Zloran's and their command center. If I have forgotten anything I appologize, I have MAJOR space lag, you understand. Now do any of your know where I can get a 30 foot tall cheese wheel?
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
|
|