Post by AREA666 on Mar 30, 2006 23:05:19 GMT -5
Here are some examples of questions people at tech help centers have to deal with.
Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with
your CD, but it just doesn't work. What am I doing
wrong?
Tech support: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive,
right?
Customer: Yeah....
Tech support: And what sort of computer are you
using?
Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer.
It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises.
Listen.....
Tech support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!
===============
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...
===============
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette
out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a
note.
Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it
yet... it's still on my desk... sorry....
===============
Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the
left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
===============
Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me
and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical
on me! I'm not Bill Gates, damn it!
===============
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't
print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'.
I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of
the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find
it...
===============
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.
===============
Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in
the supermarket.
===============
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the
computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces
back.
Customer: OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged
in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here Ah...that one
does work
===============
Tech support: Your password is the small letter a as
in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number
7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
===============
Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right
password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
===============
Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
===============
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed
a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move
the mouse, it disappears.
===============
Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address,
but how do I get the circle around it?
===============
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a
problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that
is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next
to me is under a window, and his printer is working
fine."
===============
And last but not least:....
Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and
escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task
list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter
"P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with
your CD, but it just doesn't work. What am I doing
wrong?
Tech support: OK, you've got the CD in the CD drive,
right?
Customer: Yeah....
Tech support: And what sort of computer are you
using?
Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer.
It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises.
Listen.....
Tech support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!
===============
Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
Female customer: A white one...
===============
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette
out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a
note.
Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it
yet... it's still on my desk... sorry....
===============
Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on the
left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
===============
Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me
and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical
on me! I'm not Bill Gates, damn it!
===============
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't
print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'.
I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of
the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find
it...
===============
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.
===============
Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in
the supermarket.
===============
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the
computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces
back.
Customer: OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged
in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here Ah...that one
does work
===============
Tech support: Your password is the small letter a as
in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number
7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
===============
Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right
password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
===============
Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
===============
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed
a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move
the mouse, it disappears.
===============
Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address,
but how do I get the circle around it?
===============
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a
problem with her printer.
Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that
is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next
to me is under a window, and his printer is working
fine."
===============
And last but not least:....
Tech support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and
escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task
list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter
"P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
Tech support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!
-+-Win32##Microsoft Internet Explorer 6.0##1024 × 768##1-+-
